


Rum and Stun Cuffs

by draconicsockpuppet



Category: Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies), Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: M/M, Space Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 11:09:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21014789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/draconicsockpuppet/pseuds/draconicsockpuppet
Summary: Han has a very bad day and then a very good day. Jack always has good days when there's rum.





	Rum and Stun Cuffs

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fairleigh](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fairleigh/gifts).

"There you are, mate." The pirate patted Han's cheek, his hand gnarled under all the jeweled rings he wore. "We'll just relieve you of your cargo, and off you go."

"Over my dead body!" Han struggled against his bonds, but the stun cuffs held fast. "Gardulla will have my guts for fish bait if I don't get that shipment to Nar Shadaa on time."

"What's a bright boy like you doing working for Hutts?" The pirate smiled, his teeth glinting with gold. "Have you considered piracy? Good pay, fine company, and all the freedom you could want. The galaxy's your oyster. Just say yes."

"And have every bounty hunter _in_ the galaxy out for my blood? No thanks." Han jerked against the cuffs one last time, then leaned back against the pipe he was tied to.

The pirate followed, so close Han could smell the rum on his breath. "If your cargo's worth so much to you, perhaps you'd be willing to make a small trade to keep it." And he winked.

Han twisted his head away.

"It wouldn't hurt you to be a little more … cooperative." The pirate ran a finger lightly down Han's arm. "You're a lovely young man with lots of opportunities, I'm sure. It would be a shame to maroon you and your furry friend on an uninhabited planet, never to be seen again."

Han rolled his eyes, then sighed. "Fine. What's the trade."

"One kiss, in exchange for your cargo and your life." The pirate grinned. "Or you can come with, that's always an option. You seem a clever sort; a pirate's life might agree with you."

Han grimaced. "Just a kiss?"

"More if you want it, not if you don't. Besides, how many people can say they've kissed Jack Sparrow?"

Han nodded slowly.

Jack pecked him on the cheek, then grinned and patted the spot he'd kissed. "There you go, mate. Enjoy your work, and maybe we'll meet again." And then he and his disreputable group of pirates whirled out of the _Falcon_ just as quickly as they'd whirled in.

When Chewie woke up from the tranquilizer and let Han out of the cuffs, sure enough, Gardulla's shipment of spice and droid parts was still in the hold – but every drop of liquor on the ship was gone.

* * *

_Five years later…_

* * *

Han's back slammed into the bulkhead as the door slid shut on him and his armful of pirate.

"Good to see you, Captain Solo," Jack purred.

"Shut up and take your clothes off."

"Hmm, no. Make me."

Han unzipped his fly with one hand and yanked at Jack's hair with the other. "If you're not going to fuck me, then put that smart mouth of yours to work doing something useful."

"I take your point." Jack sank to his knees and licked his lips, then swallowed Han down.

It was about this time that Chewie walked around the corner and screamed.

"Come on!" Han yelled. "I haven't gotten laid in months."

_You have a bunk,_ Chewie said. _Use it._

Han tapped Jack on the shoulder. "My crew is mutinying."

Chewie crossed his arms and waited.

Meanwhile, Jack did not seem concerned in the slightest by their furry, disapproving audience as he slurped away. Han made a face – Jack was too good with his tongue, in several different ways. Finally he shoved Jack off and tried to pack his erection back in his pants, with minimal success. "The furball is right. I have a bunk."

Jack rose with a wince. "Does this bunk have rum in it?"

"I keep some just for you." Han took his hand and tugged him over to the cabin, then glared at Chewie, who was still watching. "A little privacy, here?"

The door slammed shut on a long, mournful howl.


End file.
